16 Aug My Husband Had A Boudoir Session and It Completely Changed Our Lives | Austin Boudoir Photography
Photographed By: Jen Swedhin
Retouched By: Elizabeth Zimmerman
I’m going to share something very personal. This is me being very real, vulnerable & raw here…
My husband had boudoir photos taken a week ago and what’s occurred since has been truly incredible — and honestly, SHOCKING.
Even though I’m a boudoir photographer, I have never really felt like a very sexual person. I’ve always liked it, but have never felt like I NEEDED it.
I definitely enjoy the topic of sex though.
I’ve recently realized that the way I was raised has had a MASSIVE impact on my sexuality, in multiple ways.
The Good Girl
I’ve always felt like I couldn’t be “bad”…like I always had to keep my shit together, even as a very young girl. I was the middle child — my little sister has disabilities & needed lots of extra help in the form of therapies & extra attention. My big brother had issues with depression & drugs & alcohol & running away, etc… I had to be even keel, the peacekeeper, good & perfect. At all times.
In addition to that, my parents raised us very catholic and made me, specifically, go to youth group shit and sign a “True Love Waits” contract promising that I wouldn’t have sex before marriage. Sure, it was only a stupid piece of paper…but for me, I had to follow the rules & be “good” – as much as I hated it & disagreed.
So, I feel like I have always been a bit stunted in my sexuality. I waited to have sex with Neil until we were married — we tried a few times before but it was always too painful. He waited too, so I felt less alone in that way. his was out of choice, not shame.
I didn’t realize how totally brainwashed I really was until we were able to successfully have sex on our wedding night. It was all totally mental. How awful is that?!
But!! Neil doing this session has sparked such a massive fire in me and even almost a sort of “rebirth”…as dramatic as that sounds. It really feels this way.
All I kept thinking about leading up to his session was how much this would affect him, how much it would help him. Because that’s definitely what it’s done for me. I’ve had 10+ boudoir shoots myself and each time it’s freeing, amazing, emotional & empowering.
I’ve personally only known the feeling of GIVING myself to my husband in the form of a boudoir album, or wall art, or even the mobile app.
While that experience is fucking amazing…it actually pales in comparison to the experience of being GIVEN the gift of boudoir by your partner.
Being on the receiving end of this experience?! This is unreal & out of this world. Neil told to me the night after his session that I am now able to see him the way he has always seen me.
I want him now. I crave him. And not that I wasn’t attracted to him before at all — I for sure was. But my drive was basically non-existent. Seeing him this way — seeing him through Jen’s eyes…hearing such incredible feedback about my amazing husband from friends and clients in my VIP FB group is interestingly affirming. I posted this sneak peek of him a couple of days after his session and the feedback is so great! I read them to Neil that night and it made him feel so, so good. Also, a HUGE part of the boudoir experience. The affirmations are wonderful.
20 Years Together…
Look – we’ve been together since 1999. That’s a full 20 years now. We were just 15 & 17 years old when we met. Now, three pregnancies, two kids, a few houses, lots of different jobs and a ton of life experiences together…we are such different people. We’ve basically grown up together.
It’s so wonderful to have this new spark in our relationship. So unexpected and so unbelievably refreshing and amazing! Y’all, we’ve had more sex in the last week than we have in the totality of our damn relationship — I’m kidding, but it really is a whole new world.
So, without further ado, here is my AMAZINGLY sexy husband, Neil…
In His Own Words
Going into the shoot, were you worried scared about anything?
I was concerned I would just feel awkward about it and not really care about the results.
What is the number one reason you would recommend doing a shoot with Jen over any of the other photographers out there?
Jen felt very authentic. I didn’t feel like it was a chore for her to get through.
What was your favorite part of your session?
The reaction of my wife!
Would you have another boudoir shoot with me in the future?
What changes have you noticed in yourself after your photo shoot with me?
Much more confidence.
Jen – How can I put into words what you have done for both Neil and me? I honestly can’t. You are an amazing friend & photographer and I will always be so grateful for this entire experience with you. Thank you & I love you.
S MosesPosted at 23:06h, 13 August
So freakin amazing. So glad the two of you had this experience and are enjoying the positive aspects that this has added to your relationship. Thanks for sharing something so personal, so others can benefit too.💕
Jen SwedhinPosted at 11:16h, 14 August
Wow, I don’t even know what to say! I’m so honored you asked me, and so incredibly honored that Neil was willing to trust me and work through his insecurities with me. I love you both so much, and it makes my heart so happy to hear that it has had such a major impact for you both! ❤️❤️
Amy StewartPosted at 15:40h, 14 August
Amazing! I love this! 20 years is no joke and keeping the spark (especially the way you were raised) is no easy feat!
This is what really struck me “Neil told to me the night after his session that I am now able to see him the way he has always seen me.”